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I don't know why I do this to myself. Every year, every year, I am disappointed. I never get to stand up and cheer "Oh my God, So-and-so won!"

I want to. I don't get to.

It's frightening sometimes the similarities in thought processes I share with weetanya. She beat me already to the "love/hate Oscar" bit and the "Jackson's got two more chances," observation.

Best Director: The Academy could have made me happy in many ways, but they didn't. Hell, for Best Director, the odds were for making me happy, not against: I would have been exceedingly happy if Lynch had won, pleased if Jackson had won, and content if Scott had won, but no: Opie got it. Don't get me wrong, Howard seems a decent enough fellow, but next to an honest-to-God original visionary like Lynch, or even Scott, well . . .

Dammit, Mr. Lynch, I'm sorry. I am deeply and humbly sorry that there were only eight people watching Mulholland in all of Atlanta the night I saw it. I am sorry that whatever body makes these decisions either doesn't recognize or simply doesn't acknowledge your genius. I have a grave fear that you're going to get one of those lifetime achievement awards without ever having won a real one. I hope I am wrong. I also hope you get it before you are too old to hobble on stage to receive it, so that it will not be quite so bittersweet.

I haven't seen A Beautiful Mind. I am just too tired of R. Crowe to bother. Bored now. No offense to the man, he was wonderful in Gladiator, but he also had a good script and a talented director.

Haven't seen Training Day. Doubt it's Denzel's best performance, but he's very talented, and certainly deserves it for many a past performance.

Haven't seen Monster's Ball. Need to do so. Didn't have any real preference in this one, save perhaps a mild one for Renée Zellweger, since she's been credible in everything I've seen her in. Halle Berry has been kind of a lightweight in the things I've seen her in, but I guess that could've been the movies, and hey, she had the class to acknowledge the amazing powerhouse that is Angela Bassett, so I'll give her points for that. Think it is silly to make the whole thing into a race thing, but Hollywood deals in broad, sweeping brushstrokes, and the awards have never been about merit. (Not saying that Berry didn't deserve it, just saying that Rush was passed over for Quills, and we've all just seen too many examples in the past where people who gave better performances didn't receive the award. Bassett almost certainly should have been in line ahead of Berry.)

I need to see Amelie.

Best Picture:
It angers me that LotR got stuck with the Fantasy Film Curse at the Oscars. Dammit, it is Tolkien. Dammit, what a cast. Forget McKellen: why in the green and purple sand wasn't Bean nominated? What about Astin? Either one - both were deserving.

Why do I do this to myself? I could've been making levels in DAoC. Oh, and that half-assed little mention of Hedwig in the middle of the Sundance Festival montage was worse than no mention at all, to my mind. With no mention, they could pretend they didn't know about it. With the mention, we know they knew about it, and still didn't consider it worthy. Fools.

The Academy has made me more interested in seeing In the Bedroom. I like Spacek anyway.

As I predicted, Owen Wilson continues to move up. I think a Tom Hanks trip is not out of the question for him.

Sidney Poitier remains magnetic. He simply will not be dismissed. His eyes are sharp, and look like glittering dark, fierce acorns.

Well, LotR's music has grown on me, I'll admit, and I left myself room for that in my review. Parts of it are achingly beautiful . . . but don't be thinking you're gonna be John Williams any time soon, Shore. Just be grateful for your Oscar. Let's hope that Fellowship was you leaving yourself room for parts 2 and 3 to really shine.

Best Supporting Actor:
Makes me want to see Iris.

Best Sound Editing:
If there's a war movie, it always wins this category. If there's no war movie that year, or if it's a year with a prominent Hollywoodian at the helm of a sci-fi movie, that'll get it. Natch, with sci-fi creds and war, too, Scott's Black Hawk Down won this.

Best Art/Set:
Kinda feel sorry for Harry Potter, in a way: it didn't get nuthin. How the frell Moulin Rouge got it over LotR, though . . . it's beyond me. Way beyond me. I mean, for heaven's sake, the movie's had a special and supposedly a museum exhibit (did that ever happen?) about how much went into the art and sets for it. I just really can't believe it didn't win.

Best Cinematography:
Well, yay, LotR, but, well, in fairness, I'm not sure it's that hard to make a travelogue of the extraordinarily-gorgeous New Zealand.

Best Makeup:
I am not surprised they showed John Rhys-Davies in the clips for this one. Bless your heart, man, I do hope you feel a little vindicated for the skin you lost for this part. Putting prosthetics over scabs, and then on the third day, when there was simply no skin left around his eyes to work with, and then acting through it . . . bless you, Gimli, bless you.

Best Film Editing:
No, I really have no idea why Memento didn't win this like it should've. I think because the Academy voters have gotten ingrained to think "editing = war/sci-fi movie" and "documentary = Holocaust pic."

Best Supporting Actress:
The only category that I liked four out of the five nominees, and the fifth I didn't dislike, she was just an unknown quantity to me. Helen Mirren or J. Connelly would have been especially happy for me, and J. Connelly won. However, there's just one problem: this is the only award I didn't see awarded. Pizza arrived. So, I still didn't actually get to see "the Academy did something right" in progress.

Ugh. Cameron Diaz drives me nuts. The dress was lovely, but her hair looked awful, and it was made worse by the fact that she was chewing gum like a damned cow during the ceremony. I missed Bjork this year, bless her. Nicole Kidman's dress was unattractive, but she always reminds me of a wicked stepsister of some sort. I think Julia Roberts is highly overrated, but her dresses the past two years have been good. J.Lo's hair looked stupid. What the hell was Gwyneth Paltrow thinking? Was she trying to make her torso look as ugly as possible? Dunst: just because they made it doesn't mean they made it for you, dear. Try again. Berry was exquisitely gorgeous, but I somehow don't think she would have chosen that dress if she'd thought she had a chance in hell of winning. Laura Harring: a little odd, but it looked good. Reese Witherspoon looked lovely, as did Kate Winslet. Naomi Watts, ditto on the odd but good. Someone, please help Helen Hunt dress. And let it not be Gwyneth Paltrow.

Worst dress of the night:
Paltrow. She looked lumpy, like the potter wasn't even remotely finished with her yet.

Nice to see Glenn Close, but that whole commentator thing was rather odd.

Very best part of the night for me? Cirque de Soleil.


Twin Peaks: Snoqualmie

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